Motherhood.

Finally, after years of pining after every dog I ever see (the way some women pine for babies), and feelings of jealousy toward dog-owners jogging unassumingly with their pups, or hikers hiking with theirs, I am a mommy to the sweetest, smartest, most precious little blob of a puppy. 

This is Bodhi:

Bodhi is a word in the context of Buddhism which conveys knowingness, or enlightenment.  Or more specifically, to awaken, the way the Buddha did.  Prayer malas are sometimes made out of bodhi seeds; seeds from the tree of enlightenment. 

The name came to me watching Bodhi play at the animal shelter where I found him; he was pouncing around and then paused to stretch out under a bench in the play area, and looked at me with his big hazel eyes, and it just felt like, This is him.  A little awakening is exactly what I need.

I hadn't planned on adopting a full-on puppy, or a male dog, for that matter.  (I already have two male birds, which was completely unplanned given that you can't tell the sex of a bird until it matures.)  I thought I could use a little feminine energy around me, but nope!  Bodhi is all boy, and I love it.

As soon as I told the good, kind people at the shelter to go ahead with the adoption paperwork, I was filled with tons of warm fuzzies and a joy that can only be described as the kind of joy tells you you are in exactly the right place at the right time.  All nervousness about what a huge responsibility I was taking on aside, once I made the decision, all the nerves faded and all I felt was happy. 

Bodhi has only occasionally been anything but pure joy since I brought him home.  And that's only because he doesn't realize he has a bladder yet, and despite my frequent trips with him outside to the great outdoor toilet that is the backyard, he occasionally stands looking at me -- on the carpet -- while urine streams from his little peepee.  Poor kid. 

He also had his little balls snipped and I brought him home still doped up on anesthesia.  But it seemed like as soon as it wore off and he could walk straight again, it's like he doesn't even miss those things, nor does he realize he has stitches where his manhood used to be.  And he's already learned to sit!  He is obviously smarter than me, which means I'm in trouble, because at only two months, Bodhi weighs almost 16 pounds.

He is going to be HUGE.  He's German Shepherd mixed with... something.  The trainer at Petco said maybe Mastiff.  And the vet told me this morning that he will gain approximately 2-3 lbs PER WEEK.  So, basically, if I wait a few months, I can invest in a small saddle and ride him to work.

You guys, the years of waiting for my very own puppydog are totally worth it.  I am in love, and I am totally unashamed.